Thursday, March 24, 2011

I Hate McDonalds Now!

This video is a-mazing.

"I like playing in the damn playpen in McDonalds!"

"I can make my own damn soda, you know that right? Sugar, water Kool-Aid, bitch!"

Monday, March 21, 2011

Vegas Day Five

Yes, we are the only people that stay in Vegas longer than 4 days.

I awoke to hear the people in the room next to us having sex again. Seriously, I was starting to get jealous. We got up, packed up, and took our luggage downstairs to store for the day before we had to head to the airport.

There were a few things we had wanted to do in Vegas, but hadn't yet, so we figured we better get around to it. My girlfriend had her heart SET on going on the gondola ride at the Ventian so we figured why not. The thing is there are two sets, an indoor and an outdoor ride, and they aren't connected. We set out to get some info about them, and it wasn't as easy as you'd think. We waited in the inside line, only to be told that we had to buy our tickets elsewhere, so we went to the place to buy tickets and got some more info. The outside ride is about a minute less than the inside ride, but it was gorgeous out so we decided on that one and had to head back outside. The ride was kind of fun, even though it lasted only about 6-7 minutes I think? The gondola guy was super nice and he sang to us in Italian (hot.) He also was telling us that about once a month someone falls into the water there. Vegas crazies I tell ya!

Nothing makes me hungrier than boating in 6-inch water so we decided to grab a cab to In-N-Out Burger. It was all our our first times and we'd heard amazing things. The burger was in fact pretty delicious, but the fries weren't great. Kind of a weird texture, like those popcorn twists that melt in your mouth. Mickey D's still definitely has the best fries on record.

After that we sorta wandered the strip until it was time to go home. I remember for some reason standing in front of the fountain at the Bellagio for about a half hour. Oh yeah, I think my friend wanted picutres (even though I'm sure she had taken a hundred already) and we got there JUST too late for the previous show.

As we were meandering along I do remember a guy hitting on me... and calling me "Sugarbum." Best nickname ever! Honestly, I will answer to Sugarbum from now on.

At the airport I ate a Cinnabon and it was the most delicious thing ever. Why did they ever take them out of the Abby/Langley malls? Oh yeah, for the sake of my Sugarbum :)

On the plane I was the hit of the party. I don't even remember how it happened but I ended up telling the couple behind to to stop it with the PDA (they weren't even making out,) and the husband was totally joking around with me while the wife was looking embarassed. Also there was this semi-cute Asian guy behind me who I was chatting with and turned out to be a DJ from Vancouver. He kept telling how awesome he was... and then at the end when I was like "So what are you, DJ Awesome?" um yeah he was. DJ Johnny Awesome to be specific.

Oh yeah, and remember the guy I met in the pool that was on our same flight? When my friend got up to go to the bathroom he came and sat beside me... And asked me to join the Mile High Club with him again. I laughed and said no. He replied with "Why wouldn't you?" and kept asking me why not. Um... I don't know you, you probably have herpes, the bathrooms are yucky, and not to mention tiny. Shall I go on? He returned to his seat. (Oh but he did text me later that night and say he had nowhere to stay so could he stay at my house? I told him to ask my Dad.)

We touched down, grabbed our luggage and headed home. (With a quick stop at the duty free for some Grey Goose... so cheap!)

All in all it was a very successful ladies trip. I can't wait to go back!

Friday, March 04, 2011

Vegas Day Four

Our fourth day in Vegas was another sleep in, then go to the pool day. Except that this time everyone was even more hungover and I went by myself. The girls trickled in one by one to join me.

The pool this day was filled with entertaining people to meet. Two British ladies walked over and started a conversation with me... about how their brother over there on the other side of the pool thinks I'm cute and I should go over and talk to him. He was fat, bald, and wearing a cowboy hat. YES! Totally my type! (Obviously kidding.) Oh yeah, I should mention that these ladies didn't have posh sounding accents, like hot black British guy, or Harry Potter... they had total cockney accents. So what they were saying came out like: "Do ye want to meet me brotha? He fancies you! He's a fine bloke, me brotha!" I politely declined.

There were also a couple of guys sitting near us that we had our eyes on.
Can you say abs? When we finally started talking to them it turned out they were from Prince George. I'm telling you, half the people you meet in Vegas are from BC. And once we got to talking we discovered that they were going to be on our plane ride home. I was flirting with one of them when he mentioned that we should join the Mile High Club on the way home. I laughed it off.

After pool time we headed to Pink's for a hot dog. Well, mine was more of a burrito that happened to have a wiener (well, 2 weiners) in it. It was huge and it had chili and cheese and tomatoes. The chili was delicious. I'd order it again but I think I'd actually rather have it sans-weiner.

That night the other 2 girls went to see "O" by Cirque de Soliel while we napped. Well, tried to nap, the neighbors were at it again! We met the girls after their show for dinner at an Italian restarant in the Venetian. It seemed really strange to be eating pasta at 10ish at night.

The restaurant we were at didn't have its own restroom, you had to use the hotel ones, but we discovered that we could sneak into the adjoining restaurant and use theirs. I walked through the glass doors, and then headed up the stairs... Where I was greeted by a male bathroom attendant... Who opened the bathroom door for me. Interesting. Then I walked into the bathroom, and he accompanied me, and opened the stall door too. Strange. It turned out that this bathroom won an award in 2009 for America's Best Public Restooms. Everything in there is marble, with gold trim. There's even a lion's head fountain and fancy murals on the wall.

We took it easy on Freemont Street that night. Walked around with a couple of beers and watched the light show, which was a "Born to be Wild" theme featuring motorcycles and skulls. We then hopped a cab to the Wynn and Encore to follow up crappy Vegas with schmancy Vegas! And then walked the entire way back. A lovely walk to end a lovely day.

Thursday, March 03, 2011

Vegas Day Three

I woke up with a sore throat, headache and stuffy nose. Oh, had I failed to mention that on the airplane ride down the lady who sat beside me was coughing up a lung the entire time, and not even trying to cough into her arm or the corner? Yeah, I saw this one coming. There is such a thing as cold etiquette, people! Keep your germs to yourself!

We decided to hit the strip, walk around and check out a bunch of hotels. This was fun and all, but after a point all I wanted to do was go back to the room and nap... so I did.

I woke up a few hours later feeling refreshed. I hopped in the shower and started getting ready for the night. I assumed the girls would be back soon... but I waited, and waited and waited. Apparently they were busy walking around yelling "DAY DRUNK" and taking pictures with man-strippers. Do I sound bitter? Ok, I was jealous, I admit it. No day drunk for me.

We had dinner at PF Chang's that night and it was surprisingly good. It was more "real" Chinese-foody than I expected.

After dinner we hopped into a cab and headed to Voodoo Lounge at the Rio. The cab ride was one of the funniest things that happened the whole week. My "DTMF" girlfriend sat in the front with our Arabic driver and proceeded to grill him about how to say different things in his language. Unfortunately, he'd only been in the country 3 weeks or so and it was a bit of a challenge. Most of the things she was asking weren't exactly things you'd use on a daily basis as a cabbie. The main thing she was trying to learn to say was "Do you want to have sex with me?" She kept trying to explain it in different ways to get him to understand, finally blurting out: "What would you say if I wanted to ask you to have sex with me?" Without skipping a beat he turned to her and stated: "I would say... No problem!" I almost peed myself laughing.

Voodoo Lounge is super cool because it's way up on the 51st floor and the view is amazing. However, the other patrons left a little bit to be desired. It must have been classic rock night or something, because the dance floor was full of 45-year-old men. We grabbed a drink and headed to the edge of the patio that overlooked the VIP section. We were watching a super-drunk man dancing at what seemed to be a work party. He started to walk over to say hi to us, and two women stopped him. We couldn't overhear the conversation, but there was definitely some finger wagging.

We left Voodoo and headed across the street to The Palms, which has 2 clubs. We stopped in at Ghost first. It had a really nice set up, and like Voodoo had a large patio with a great view. It even had areas of the floor that were see-thru, just like in the CN Tower. However, just like its name, Ghost was empty. (Except for some little Asian boys from Burnaby that we met. Small world.)

Once again we bailed and headed to our final desination: Moon. I will describe our time at Moon as a drunk dance-a-thon shit-show. We somehow ended up in a breakdance circle pretending we were in Step Up 3D. I remember at some point a guy jumped on the floor and dove through my legs and then started doing the worm... And I distinctly remember someone taping us on his iPhone and hoping I wasn't going to end up on You Tube. So far so good!

My feet were killing me so I talked a guy into letting us chill with him and his friends at their table... where I proceeded to jump barefoot onto the speaker and start dancing. The bouncer walked over and I was waiting for him to tell me to get the hell down, and he only told me to put my shoes back on. Vegas is so much cooler than Vancouver! Day 3 was a success!

Wednesday, March 02, 2011

Anti-Bullying Flash Mob

Way to go Vancouver! Students from David Lloyd George Elementary and Sir Winston Churchill Secondary got together in January to do an anti-bullying flash mob at Oakridge Centre. Amazing! It even ended up on Perez!

Take a look!