ATTENTION: Before you read this post you need to go into it with an open mind. If you already saw the word Jesus and thought to yourself: "Now what is that heathen going to say about my friend J-dawg?" Then you should probably just stop now.
I have a bit of a conundrum... and I HONESTLY would like someone to give me some answers. Comments people, comments! (Please... Luvs ya!)
The Jesus Theory
According to the bible Jesus was born because God impregnated Mary in an immaculate conception. The family Jesus was born into was Mary and Joseph, who were a nice married couple... Or were they? For a marriage to be upheld the marriage needs to be consummated. Well, if Mary was a virgin then she obviously had NOT done it with Joseph... Therefore they were not actually married. So, if Jesus was born to an unmarried couple then what does that make him? GASP!!!! A bastard.
I'm sorry... but that's the lesser of two evils at this point... There's more... (You can still stop reading if you want... you aren't gonna like this!)
You don't want to believe Jesus is a bastard right? Who would want to think that? So let's work things out to say that he isn't. Well... if Jesus isn't a bastard then his parents would have had to be married. Therefore Joseph and Mary did it. Probably many times. They consummated the heck out of their marriage. (Did they have honeymoons back then?) So... one of those squirmy little Joseph spermies made it to one of Mary's holy eggs... And a baby was created. A regular 'ol joe baby who was born 9 months later in a manger. So the theory of Jesus being the son of God who came to earth to save us all is wrong... And therefore Christianity is based on something that isn't true.
So... which is it?